-Less is More-

I’ve had a lot on my mind these past couple of weeks as we started a new year. Every year, I always try to think of a word to represent what I will strive for in that year to come. I’ve struggled to find a word this year. I don’t think that I’m going to choose one. I always make resolutions and do pretty well until mid-February and then I fall off. As many Americans do. I have struggled for months to find “more” in every aspect of my life it seems. I want more money, more quality time with my husband and baby, more consistency, more energy, more motivation. What I have realized is that I don’t need more of any of those things. What I need more of is Jesus and all those areas will naturally feel fulfilled. My life feels as if it has been dull. Ever since Liv stopped nursing I have felt a sense of sadness and lack of motivation to do anything. Seriously, it takes everything in my power to do the laundry or do the dishes. Which starts another battle with feeling like I’m being a terrible wife and I’m slacking on my wifey duties. Again, I need more Jesus. We are so richly blessed so why don’t I feel like it? Why do I still feel as if something is missing? Why do I never feel content or happy? As I have set aside some quiet time and have been reading God’s word more, I have come to a very tough realization. It’s not what I need more of, it’s what I need less of. I need minimalism. Simplicity. I need less things and more memories, love, purpose, and intention. Why am I on this earth? Why did God create me? What is His purpose for me? I’m pretty positive that it’s not constantly feeling unhappy and wanting “more.”

A few verses that have really stuck out to me lately are: And he said to them, “Take care, be on your guard against all covetousness, for one’s life does not consist in the abundance of his possessions.” — Luke 12:15

“Sell your possessions, and give to the needy. Provide yourselves with moneybags that do not grow old, with a treasure in the heavens that does not fail, where no thief approaches and no moth destroys. For where your treasure is, there will your heart be also.” — Luke 12:33-34

“Now there is great gain in godliness with contentment, for we brought nothing into the world, and we cannot take anything out of the world. But if we have food and clothing, with these we will be content. But those who desire to be rich fall into temptation, into a snare, into many senseless and harmful desires that plunge people into ruin and destruction.” — I Timothy 6:6-8

It is pretty evident that God is not impressed by our material things and possessions. What He treasures is focus on Him, focusing on our purpose, and taking care of the people in our lives. My love needs to be poured into Him rather than focusing so much of my time wanting “more” of whatever it might be that day. A person of contentment is way more desired than a person of wealth and possessions. We can’t take anything with us when we leave this world and we can’t “work” on ourselves anymore. The time is now. When I let all of those thoughts and feelings go, when I sell things in our home that have no value or meaning to me, when I choose to live joyfully and content. The time is now. So farewell 2016. No resolutions, no word, just ACTIONS. This year will be different. This year will be my year where I really find myself and when I really find my Jesus. I’m excited for a new beginning and am not at all sad to say goodbye to an old me.

-Letters to Liv- {16 Months}

16 Months! Here we go! You are the chattiest and sassiest little thing that I've ever seen. You are driving your Daddy's nerves bonkers and it's secretly funny to watch. You loved the holidays so much this year and you were so fun to watch on Christmas. Last year, you were a little bitty almost 4 month old. I hate how time flies so fast. I miss all of the little things you did and the way you made me feel as a baby. But then I really love this phase you're in as well. Watching you grow and learn things every day warms my mama heart. You are developing so perfectly and your language has really exploded this month. You jabber and really think that you're saying things all the time. You got a kitchen for Christmas and your imaginative and pretend play skills are really emerging and I love it. You will put something in the microwave and say "beep beep beep" like it's done. It's so cute. You still love music and dance all the time. You can be crying in your car seat and the minute we play music you are dancing and clapping your hands. We turned your car seat around a couple of weeks ago and you love it so much more. You can see things out the window and you've started labeling objects. Even when we're driving, you'll see the train and say "choo-choo" or say "tree" when we pass by the trees. You are really into your baby dolls again. You love to push them in their stroller, rock them, feed them, and even try to swaddle them. You're little mind works so fast and you get bored with a lot of things after a while. You are so into any task that I give you and you have to feel like you've accomplished it yourself or you get upset. I have no idea where you get that! You love to color. Give you a pen and paper and you are busy for a while. I'm going to start introducing you to new tasks that are more sensory based. I think you will love it. Your appetite has changed quite a bit. You only want to snack and that's it. If it doesn't have sugar you don't want it. It's driving me crazy, but then you'll have your days where you eat so much I have no clue where you put it. You won't hardly touch any veggies now and are still a fruit girl. Your teachers say that you are the best little helper at school. You help them clean up the toys and the tables and you talk non-stop all day long. I think you've been going through another growing spurt because you've been limping quite a bit lately. You are better now but for about two weeks you were limping pretty bad. You've also started to try to sing. ABC's, Rock-a-bye baby, Itsy Bitsy Spider and you are gesturing to songs. You can identify all of your body parts and are understanding way more than you let on. Your current word list: car, go, bye bye, hi, baby, boo, hot, what's that?, shoe, eye, horse, dog, woof, cat, bubble, sock, ball, eat, that, mama, daddy, no, choo-choo, light, tree and a whole bunch of unitelligible words haha. We love you so much, sweet baby!!

Love, Mama